Need some motivation and support.

I feel so ugly and disgusting. I weigh 240, my roots are growing back, my pores are huge and I look wrecked all the time.

So I decided two days ago to rejoin my gym that I quit, because of the hours due to COVID and I am trying to find the motivation to go back and work hard and try to lose weight. But I need some support and motivation and just some hype women, letting me know I can do it. Every time I think of the goal I have the journey to it seems SO SO FAR and impossible. I want this so badly, I’ve never really been small but I’ve never weighed this much in my life and I want to change that. Every time I look in the mirror I get upset, because my skin looks awful from all the junk food and grease my pores are gigantic and eventually I’ll try to get to my hair (my birthday is coming in April, maybe it’ll be a treat) but I’m waiting for my bangs to grow back out due to an impulsive cut.... 🙄 I know.

I can’t even have sex with my fiancé with my shirt off, because I feel SO insecure and and I use humor and talking during as a coping mechanism 😅 so he is distracted my annoyance rather than looking at my body....

But I want to feel good, happy, and more energized and active. I want this. I just don’t know if I can do this....

I just need support and hype to HOPEFULLY at least start this habit.