Would you be upset if your best friend of more than 10 years didnt come to your bachelorette?

Question

This happened in 2019 so no COVID shaming lol!
So I had my bachelorette on 2019 and it was to be planned by my 2 best friends. One of them is more of a party girl so she kinda took the lead in the planning. From what I was told my other best-friend didn’t really do much or helped much. Also refused to pay for some stuff. 
Anyways a couple of weeks before the bachelorette, my “BFF” informs me by text that she will not be attending because she doesn’t like my other friends, she felt like she was put to the side during the planning, that she is a married woman and not a partier/drinker so she doesn’t want to be a part of the night... mind you we had lots of day time sober activities and a nice supper that she could have participated in but decided not to...
Also keep in mind I threw her a bachelorette a year prior all by myself and paid for everything and never said a word about it!!
Ive kinda let it go and we resumed our friendship although it has been different, but its really bothering me these days because Im 19 weeks pregnant and shes 5 weeks pregnant and shes already telling me she wont come to my baby shower because of covid... 
I havent even though of a baby shower yet so idk why shes already telling me shes not coming to a baby shower that doesn’t even exist yet!!!
I feel like this friendship is very one sided and she has a hard time not being the center of attention... my other friends agree on this and think im nuts to keep it going.

Answer

Lol so she gets married and now thinks she is the Virgin Mary? Pft. Don’t even waste your time. Drop her like a hot potato.

Answer

She told you where your friendship stood when she decided to not go to your bachelorette party because she’s married. Unless you guys were like doing coke or something insane idk why being married would stop her from going to your party. It’s her right to make that decision, but that would show me where her priorities are and I’d realize that our friendship wasn’t in her radar. I’d act accordingly and see her or talk to her very rarely if any at all.

Answer

It’s defiantly one sided and I don’t think you would be missing much if you let the relationship go. 
I am actually getting Married next month, my bachelorette is the first weekend of the month and I would be heartbroken if any of my bridesmaids or maid of honors didn’t come solely based on them not liking someone, it’s not about them, it’s about us. So that was extremely selfish of her ESPECIALLY if you threw her a bachelorette and paid for everything. I’m sure she wasn’t “pushed” aside during planning, the other friend probably got sick of her and didn’t include her after awhile. Second, she is ALREADY excluding herself from a baby shower and doesn’t even exist yet (second red flag). It’s okay for her to want to be safe during covid but there is also a way to go about it. She simply could have first off, waited for an invite and second off she could have simply said something along the lines of wanting to be safe but could still buy you something or see you. 
Let her go, she wants you to be there when it’s convenient for her but not when it’s convenient for you. ✌🏻

Answer

Similar thing happened to me. My childhood best friend ditched me after I set her up with her now husband. She just started acting like she’s too good for me. Didn’t even invite me to her wedding. Sometimes it’s better to let go. People change. People like that just bring you down.

Answer

One of my best friends of over ten years (she was also a bridesmaid) didn’t show up to my bachelorette party and I was bummed, but she wasn’t the only bridesmaid that didn’t (some had other plans because it was around college graduation). I was upset with her because she literally ghosted us the night of the party, saying even while we were 2 hours into it that she was on her way. 
Then she disappeared from texts and calls. I went on to have my fun party. She later told me the next day that her boyfriend didn’t want her going out on the town with us, it sounded like he had some major insecurity issues. I brushed it off because I had a fun night and I wasn’t gonna let it get me down, and I was trying to be understanding because she was one of my best friends. We went to two different colleges and were about two hours apart so we both had different lives and friends from high school, but we had maintained our friendship through that and still spent weekends and the summers together.
The nail in the coffin for me was when she didn’t show up to the wedding a few days later. We knew she wouldn’t be at the rehearsal dinner because she had graduation at her own college, but the next day she just didn’t show up to the wedding. As a bridesmaid. We had to change the processional which ended up being fine, but she told me about two hours before walking the aisle that she wouldn’t make it because her boyfriend didn’t want her gone that night and she was having anxiety from it. I was heartbroken that one of my oldest friends had bailed on me. This boyfriend seemed toxic, and I knew about her anxiety, but I just couldn’t let it get to me on my wedding day and I just told her I loved her and hoped she was okay.
It seems like I dropped a 10+ year relationship because of some wedding drama, but I had some time to mull it over and realized she had been really flaky and there were a ton of red flags I hadn’t noticed the past few months, starting with her dating this guy. She never tried to talk to me after the wedding. I reached out to her a few months later after the dust had settled to talk to her about it. I told her how it made me feel, she apologized, and I told her I didn’t want to harbor this hurt I had with her. We said our peace and said we would stay in touch because I was moving across country for work.
I haven’t spoken to her since and that was five years ago. Last I know she married the boyfriend and moved farther away. Our friendship was just never the same. I wish her all the best though.

Answer

She might be having a lot of feeling about being pregnant during covid. It can bring up a lot of anxiety. She also might be letting you know in advance so as not to cause issues. 
If you are so bothered that she didn’t feel comfortable going to your bachelorette party then let her know or move on.

Answer

Off the cuff I would say not to worry about it. I didnt want a bachelorette party for myself, and I as a rule do not attend other people's bachelorette parties. I will always do showers, weddings, birthday parties and the like...but I'm not a bachelorette party girl. I usually send a bottle of booze via the venue with my regards.
That being said, it dosent seem like it's just the bachelorette. It seems like she is looking for excuses to not participate in general. That, is a bit worrisome. 
Perhaps keep a distance and see how things transpire.

Would you be upset if your best friend of more than 10 years didnt come to your bachelorette?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey