Communication issues

I used to think I was really good at communicating but when my life started to get hit with worse drama I found that I really din5 know how to communicate. My boyfriend says I act like a child an$ that he’s tired of having to break things down for me. How do I get better at communicating how I, feeling, knowing when to stop going to the emotional extremes and lash out , and how to stop yelling or being bitchy when I’m going through something.I feel bad because when he comes to me about something we have a conversation, but when I go to him I have a breakdown and we argue.