My heart aches for my ex.

In 2016 I walked away from my ex, Adam, because of his heroin addiction. We had a 1 year old baby girl together and despite my exhausting efforts, he could not shake his addiction. He was spiraling into lies, stealing, manipulation, physical abuse, and I had watched this amazing incredible man I had fallen in love with turn into an empty shell of a human... he was turning into a monster. He was not himself. Qll he cared about was getting high at absolutely any cost. I had no choice but to leave for my safety and the safety of our daughter. It was the hardest thing I ever did in my life.

I got full custody with no contact and a restraining order. He never even came to a single court date to fight it. Too high to care I guess.

Its been over 3 years since he last saw either of us. I've moved on. I'm now married to a wonderful man and we have 2 more beautiful daughters together.

Out of the blue yesterday (on our daughters 6th birthday) my mom gets this message from a random man on Facebook...

She doesn't know this man or why he reached out to her (she hasn't seen Adam in years) but its disheartening news.

Despite all the horrible things he did to me I never would have wished this on him. He was such a beautiful soul when we met. I fell so hard for him. I've never loved anyone like I loved him. And to know that this is what has become of him... well it absolutely breaks my heart.

I'm sorry Adam. I wish I could have saved you. I wish you could save yourself.