Okay were both new parents here and I get there's a huge adjustment going on.

Sorry in advance for the length, I seriously need some advice. Thank you so much.

My husband is the sweetest and wouldn't deliberately be mean to a baby. I really am trying to be sympathetic and consider the transition were going through and that its going to come with a lot of ups and downs , learning lessons, etc. With all the good too!

But okay what the fuhhhk. I'm sorry but I need help on how to talk to him because

1. I've tried kindly and in a way where were both learning

2. I've snapped (not badly but I definitely have a tone)

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I had a brutal pregnancy and traumatic birth. We were at the hospital for like a week + few days after and when we got home his parents came over RIGHT away which I wasn't cool with but did anyways (I'm a people pleaser and wanted his parents and him to be happy) and he's been back at work since that. I've literally been alone with a newborn while recovering (was JUST able to start sitting).

Im protective because all the stuff we went through with our baby but am also not over the top. Just want things to be respected. Like I said husband is super genuine and a great father his nerves are just shot but I'm frustrated.

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When she's crying and wants to be held he SHUSHES her! He thinks I can't hear but I do and I'm like wtf? You don't talk to a 6 week old like that. I go out there and she's on the couch in the corner and he's watching his show. I'm like she needs love dude wth.

⛔ I've told him about keeping my breastmilk in the fridge if he's done using it and he's forgotten ... But it's an every night thing now. Also we discuss the bottle being clean after feedings and he most often uses the same bottle without cleaning and just adds more milk.

‼️‼️‼️ He has fallen asleep with baby on several occasions and it's resulted in a dangerous situation but I happened to be walking by and saw. I wake him up every time like BABE and he's like don't do that it rattles me! I'm like well no sh*t you should be raffled you almost squished our child.

We've had so many heart to hearts and discussions on parenting. Heck he was the one who was so adamant about not sleeping with baby but he says he's napping and that he knows what he's doing 🤷‍♀️. We both are protective but not jealous just have our own ways but balance well when in sync. And we are not.

We've come to understandings about parenting and I just am so frustrated with being alone with baby, having my nerves be shot and lack of sleep, constantly repeating myself. Now when I'm trying to rest and she's with him I'll almost fall asleep for a quick nap and wake up all worried and frantic like I need to go check. I swear it's my mother's intuition though because 9/10 times I've needed to wake him and move baby out of the way cuz she couldn't breathe or had rolled off. I've told him countless times put her in her lounger to stay safe and he just passes out. He's working which I know is a huge thing and I'm so grateful but we both are doing a lot here and I need him to be fully alert!!

How do I talk to him? I'm tired ... Exhausted for that matter. I try to set things up for him to make it easy but I'm maintaining everything in the house, baby, his food, laundry, cleaning, it all! He helps a lot but is freking slow, unaware unintentionally... and I'm just annoyed. I feel bad but shoot come on.

Thank you again I feel like this is a novel 💕

(We don't have much help. I don't really have family that is helpful. His family is very sweet and I get along great but they are awful house guests. They also cross boundaries and have kind of a "do whatever" mentality. They've already come and it was so draining. Then it had been a week since they came and we're super adamant about coming. Husband felt bad and said they would feel left out and cause all this drama so we needed to have them back. He was like they can really help just watch! Annnnnd same situation. I was cleaning up after them, they basically took over our house, weren't aware of their loudness and how I needed help not just them awhing over baby and then started telling me what was best for my new baby 😐)