I tried leaving yesterday. Five days ago, my husband was beating on the bedroom door and yelling at me to “say it to his face,” do the taxes and use the return to get a lawyer, and a bunch of other things. He spent the next three days not speaking to me or the kids, but sent a text on Wednesday night telling me about his promotion and that he hadn’t said anything to me in three days because he was embarrassed.

However, when he came home yesterday, I saw a white car in the driveway, so I asked who had dropped him off. He cocked his head to the side and gave a face and answered with a matter of fact tone, as if I had offended him by even asking. When I asked about the interaction, he said it was because I looked at him that way. Him being “embarrassed” went away pretty quickly because he told me that he had already told me what to do. I asked why did he even get dropped off at the house and he told me because this is so much fun. As I’m being serious with him, he sits there with a smirk on his face and eventually laughed at me.

As I was leaving the house, he was sitting at his laptop. But when I went back later to get my kids, he followed me throughout the house while asking me what I was doing. Each time I responded with, “minding my business.” The kids were able to grab a set of changing clothes and got in the van, but when I sat in the driver seat, I was not allowed to close the van door because he was blocking it. I asked for him to please move to no avail. I had the kids go back inside, while my husband still followed me around asking me what I was doing. Each time I responded with minding my business, trying not to trigger anything. He accused me of giving him the silent treatment and said “you’re doing the same stuff that you say I do.”

He’s at work this morning, but I’m unsure what to do at this point. Last night, my kids slept in their beds in a house that we’ve been in for six years. I don’t want to uproot all four of my kids and take them to some over crowded shelter to increase their chances of getting Covid. I don’t want to impose on a family member either. Especially, since all I have to do is go along with him to keep the peace. It’s getting harder to do that, though.