Back story: my husband had a big issue with binge drinking. Once or twice a week he would go get rip roaring drunk then come home and verbally abuse me (call me a whore or bitch, accuse me of cheating on him when I never have nor will, just a whole bunch of mean and awful things)

I found out I was pregnant in mid-September and finally got to a point where I couldn’t take anymore and kicked him out. He then agreed to stop drinking and actually hasn’t had a drop since late September of 2020.

Well yesterday he went out with his dad and brother to spread his mom’s ashes. (She died in early 2019, he had drinking issues before this, however) and when he came back I was un-packing food and there was an un-opened bottle of wine. I asked him what’s up with that? He said they were going to drink a glass to honor his mom because wine represents the blood of Christ, but never did. So I said “ok you could have at least told me, I think full disclosure and transparency and follow through are very important when it comes to building trust around you drinking, considering the history,” and he tells me to “stop bringing up the past” and starts bringing up his issues with my dating history before he and I ever met. So then I tell him he’s minimizing the issue and not even respecting or listening to me and he responds with “Divorce me then”

I shit you not this man either threatens to divorce me or tells me to divorce him like every other month. I have talked to him before and let him know whenever he says that, even if he doesn’t mean it, it’s very hurtful and makes me want to distance myself from him. Last time I talked to him he said he understands and wouldn’t say it anymore, now here we are again. Now 30 weeks along and I’m at my wits end.

EDIT: to reply to the person who thinks we “are both big drinkers” of course I acknowledged that he didn’t drink any—no one did, they didn’t even open the bottle—and of course I have told him over and over again how I am proud of him for not drinking. I’m not sure where you are getting that we “were both big drinkers” as I rarely drink and of course not while I’m pregnant but before I was pregnant I would have one glass of wine with dinner **maybe** once or twice a week and I can count the number of times on one hand where I drank so much that I threw up (exactly once my whole life.) I’m not trying to be “right” about anything. He took a bottle with the intention of drinking after telling me repeatedly since October that he’s done with drinking and doesn’t want another drop. I was asking for some up front communication from him regarding an ongoing issue in order to build trust and I feel his response was uncalled for and wondering why he frequently responds like this.