i got asked “what do you do for fun” today and i just paused. because nothing. i work and i sleep. i rarely go out. even on days where i could be doing something i enjoy, it seems like a burden. like i really enjoy hiking in the warm weather. it’s been pretty warm here in alabama. so when i’m off work, i think about planning a hike. but then the day arrives it feels like such a burden to actually do it. or when i do decide to do something outside of work or my bed, all i can think about is getting home so i can lay in bed. i physically feel tired doing anything besides being in bed.

i have nothing i really enjoy anymore.

i do workout at the gym consistently. but besides that, i have nothing.

i think about the things i need to do. like how i need to ship these shoes a girl bought from me or that i need to do my school work or how i need to go see my mother and it all feels like such a burden. like i don’t wanna do anything. i wanna go to work so i can make money and go home and get in bed. that’s it.

i just turned 21 a few days ago. this feels so sad to me. i feel like i’m wasting my youth.

i’m not really sure what to do.