Okay, this may or may not make me sound like a child, but in all reality I am just an insecure, sad, person.

I downloaded tiktok recently (Im 22 and unemployed for the past 3 months) and I completely regret it. Not just because you can so easily get stuck just scrolling for hours, but because I see all these beautiful, talented, people. Some of them are awkward or shy, but they make it work somehow. I see my 26 year old sister on there and she has close to a thousand followers. People notice her. I am literally so lonely I just want human interaction.

Even if they aren't funny, they make it work.

I deleted all my social media except for Pinterest and Glow in mid 2017. I deleted them because we were having trust issues in our relationship. Things got better and I just didn't feel the need to get back on social media, that was, until I became unemployed and had literally nothing to do with my life. I regret downloading it because I feel shitty now, but I'm also not going to delete it because it is my only source of entertainment.

I watch comedy videos, videos by 911 dispatchers, nurses, doctors, cute animal videos, mental health and illnesses videos, curly hair stuff, etc etc. I watch a little of everything and everyone is so interesting. I want to be interesting and do something like that. I tried writing short stories, drawing, poetry, etc etc, but failed at everything. I just want to be good at something a show off a talent, but I am the most boring person on the planet.

In high school I was a pretty good singer, still am, but not near as good because I don't practice every day. Definitely not good enough to post online. I get discouraged so easily

If you're still reading and don't plan on commenting anything negative, thank you. I want to love myself and feel confident with who I am, but how can I do that when I am so boring? (Retorical question, but also not at the same time)