Okay so looooooong story short. A long time ago my husband and I split up because he treated me horribly and made me feel like the scum of the earth. I told him we were never ever getting back together and wrongfully hooked up with 2 guys to numb the pain and try to make myself feel good. (Boy did I take the wrong road, don't judge me I already know) Fast forward a few months and my husband reached out to me and somehow won me back. I was honest with him and about what went on while we were apart and he FLIPPED out. I mean, I really couldn't blame him. Anyway, somehow we managed to get through it and 4 years later we have 2 beautiful baby boys. God forgives and is so good to me. I just wish my husband was.

His hygiene is absolutely horrible, like his breath will knock me over and his teeth are falling out from years of smoking. He gets so mad at me for not wanting sex (he thinks he deserves it every day...this is our main issue) but he literally reeks and I've told him this on several occasions and nothing changes. He always brings back up the other guys I was with and said I had no problem being with them and I cant even be with my husband. Brush your damn teeth and take a shower. Thats all im asking him.

He is constantly belittling me and making me feel like an awful wife, mom and person. I've made my mistakes but I've owned them and have been nothing but honest about everything. Its been 4 years and he holds its over my head everyday and makes me feel worthless. I do nothing right and I complain all the time. Apparantely, im not allowed to be tired because I "sit" at home with my 3 year old and 6 month old. Im just at a loss because without my husband, I am nothing. I have nothing.

Im just so sick of this. I cry all the time. We fight all the time. I dont know what to do.