Non-consensual

So basically I got raped last month. I’m 21 and turning 22 this month. I was really drunk and he was too. I went to sleep. Half way conscious, halfway unconscious. Woke up to him penetrating me. I didn’t know how to process it, and I still don’t know how to. I get this dead feeling inside me sometimes. NOT numb. Numb isn’t the right word. I feel so dead inside sometimes. Like I’m just a lifeless body. It’s like I’m not even living my life. Is that normal? It’s like I’m at disbelief. I’m still in shock bc nothing like that had ever happened to me before. I’m pressing charges but I’m really nervous and scared and I don’t know why. If you’ve gone through this, can you tell me what the healing and legal process is like? Is legal even the right word? Idek man all I know is that I’ve been going through it lol