Idk if I want to go to pride this year...

I'm a gay dad. I originally used this when we were tracking our surrogates pregnancy and also used glow baby. My husband left me after 14 years of being together. He said he's bored with his life, even though I tried everything to put the spark back in our marriage. I arranged date nights and he never came to them... I even sent the kids with my mom so we could have alone time but he never wanted to. He left me and the kids at home a lot. I found out the last 2 years of our relationship he's been cheating on me with someone barely legal.... I'm even more hurt than before. I'm still trying to figure out my life without him. I'm a single dad now. He does get the kids every other weekend but they're mostly with me. We've been through so much together... I did really try to help our marriage. I didn't want to throw away 14 years because I love him and I don't think I'll ever stop loving him. I used to just know where my life was gonna be in 50 years. Growing old with him and now idek what the next 5 years look like. I usually go to pride every year with him and we bring the kids... But idk if I should go this year... For 14 years we have went to every pride together. We went to our very first pride together... It feels like going to this pride without him would be completely accepting that my marriage is over... I don't want it to be over but he doesn't want me anymore... Going without him would just feel like officially closing the last chapter in our entire relationship.... 14 years... Gone...