Is this normal when you get married young?

Question

I didnt know how much I would struggle with my identity after I got married.
Even with the faith that things will change and that God works all for the good of those who love him, there is a real questioning of my identity as a woman and wife. I wrestle with the fact that I'm not where I thought I would be at this time, with the fact that I'm 22 and do not have a license, and we do not have our own place, and I feel like I'm supposed to be a mature adult, yet I sometimes feel like we are inevitably living like teenagers in someone else's home. I didn't really think my personality would do a 180 after I had a ring on, but I thought I would have some noticable confidence of my personality at this age. For Pete's sake, I get insecure about being too youthful. I'm a grown married woman, and yet I look like I'm barely even in high school. Of course that can be a good thing, but what about when my personality matches? I pictured myself being so tough and confident in who I am, when I'm truly the same giggly, giddy, excitable, childlike girl with the same tendencies to dress like I'm a teenager. When I wear business casual clothing like I did at Bethel, I dont feel like that's my everyday style, but I wonder if it's odd for me go be do youthful and have a wedding band on at the same time. It seems like I should be wearing mom Jean's and polo shirts or something with a sophisticated sense of humor and sense of who I am. 
On one hand, I am not at all saying that I regret marrying my baby. I know without a doubt that we belong together even through the hardships. It seems like it could potentially be a good thing I still have my youthfulness. I am going to be involved in the youth group for  most of my life with Cody being a youth pastor. I have also struggled with health issues that kept me from driving safely and being able to work an extensive amount, so there is no way anyone could possibly fathom or understand why I am not where most people are. 
Is this normal? Does everyone else feel like this? I don't feel like this is solely the product of caring too much what others think.

Answer

Very normal. It is similar for unmarried people too though it is different. As a young married person you tend to not fit in anywhere. Most of the married people  are older and the ones your age are unmarried.  You just have to decide  who you want to be and become that person. The is no one certain  way you should dress. You are young still if you want to dress young and hip go for it. If your more comfortable  in "mom" clothes wear them. You get to decide  what you want and who you want to be. Don't let others opinions  make you into who you don't want to be.

Answer

Very normal.  I met my husband when I was 18, married him when I 22 going on 23. I didn't have a license. We started off living with him mom. We didn't have a car. And was struggling to make money. But here I am 27 years old now. And i can tell you that it gets better with much prayer and working on your goals. There will be occasional set backs. But more victories. Ride and enjoy the waves sis.

Answer

I dont think marriage should change you or that you need to behave a certain way. "!You are young, just doing adult things" This is sth a friend of mine who got married at 19 told me. It saved me. I got to enjoy marriage and still enjoy my age at that time. Now, i just made 30 and finally, many of my friends are married and/or have babies. I have been married the longest but that is ok. I didnt change and remained true to who i was and whatever change i needed to make came naturally over the years. All that mattered is my husband and i were on the same page and we made choices good for us and didnt allow pressures from society to force us into sth we were not or ready for. 
About the achievements, i have learnt life is a personal journey. One day, you will get there, it doesnt matter how long it takes you but the lessons you learn along the way and the person you become.

Answer

I also had a lot of health problems - they popped up around our 1 year anniversary - and it really set me back, I couldn’t read, I couldn’t drive, had to relearn how to walk, and then had to deal with the massive fatigue that came along too. I think it’s important to remember to be kind to yourself. 
It doesn’t really matter what other people’s timeline is or how yours lines up, you don’t have to force yourself to grow up if that’s not who you are yet. I would focus on your faith, your marriage, and then work on feeling better. Once you are well enough then the extra focus can be moved towards moving/work/drivers license/etc.

Answer

I feel like I spent a lot of my twenties learning who I am. Just let yourself grow, see what adventures God has for you. Don’t stress about being someone you think you should be.

Is this normal when you get married young?

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