Feeling hopeless...

I finally got my +'s and couldn't be happier. I bought the fist adorable body with cats on it (we love cat and have two cats that we love too the moon). I presented the body along with three positives test to my boyfriend and all was bliss. I keept testing and started to notice the line was fainting. Then I started to bleed... it all feel so damn just like my luck. I blame myself for telling my boyfriend and jinxing it all since it was really early. I blame my stupid body for failing me when I finally get pregnant. I feel so much anger and guilt. I am so sad...