I know we haven't been trying long, but I can't help but feel hopeless. All these posts I see of women accidentally getting pregnant on social media and here we are intentionally trying and nothing but negative after negative. I can't help but feel defeated. My husband keeps suggesting we buy "toys" now and forget about having another. It blows me away when trying for a 2nd was his idea. I was happy with our one and he convinced me to want to try for a boy. Now it's all I think about 24/7. Not to mention my hormones are barely starting to regulate after being on bc for 7 yrs. So I cry over every damn baby video/picture I come across. Like my heart aches and I can't breath properly. I have no one to talk about with this. My bestfriend tells me to just relax. My mom, lord save her, keeps trying to tell me different sex positions to do and I'm like woman that does not work 🙄. Honestly I wish she never found out we were trying. It's a constant, "Are you pregnant yet?" Then I say no and it's a " ohh you need to do this, keep your legs up here, eat this fruit, don't move for 30 mins". Welp that's my rant for the night, now back to being emotional over baby videos. Thanks for listening....