So I think I have postpartum anxiety.

I already suffer from anxiety myself but it was pretty much at its best I’ve been prior to having my baby boy.

But now i feel like it’s getting worse and worse. Im constantly worried something is going to happen to him. And irrational things to like thinking what if someone touches nuts and then touches him and then he might be allergic and die. (Also nobody in either of mine or my husbands family has any allergies)

Or that if I leave him with his grandparents what if they drop him.

And im constantly checking his temperature to see if he is okay and I have an owlet sock for night but still wake up checking he is breathing.

And if he ever gags or makes a cough I freak out and get heart palpitations and think he can’t breathe and his throats closing over or something.

The other day he skin colour looked weird when putting him in the car (would’ve been from the cold) and then I was driving and started freaking out maybe he was having a reaction to my deodorant (that I wear everyday) and I couldn’t see him in his car seat and was freaking out thinking he face was going to swell up and he won’t breathe and die.

I used to be like this with my anxiety for myself where I couldn’t try new foods or new medications or anything because I was paranoid it would kill me.

I tried anxiety medication ages ago but did not like it.

I’m Also breastfeeding.

I don’t even know how I’m going to be able to give him food in a few months when he is old enough without having a panic attack. 😞

(Also I am not depressed at all so it’s not ppd, I’m so happy with my boy, just worried because I love him so much I just don’t want anything to happen to him.. it would destroy me if something did)

Breastfeeding mamas

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey