****TW: self harm pictures at the bottom, please don’t look if it’ll make you uncomfortable or triggered in the slightest. I’m sorry ❤️****

I’ve had a bit of a difficult relationship with SH. I used to do it many years ago and was clean for four years up until last year. Then I was clean for a few months. I started SH again this year, as I went thru a period of feeling so numb and experiencing depersonalization. Now, I am 4 months clean. Last period though, I cut deeper than in the past. In the past I used a key which only left like scratches and not real bleeding. But the last two periods I used a scissor blade which did cut a bit deeper and caused bleeding. Which means they left longer lasting scars.

To get to my point, now four months later, I know it mostly all healed, but what I really wanna know if I’m crazy? Because if I look at my arm in a certain light I can see some of the scars just faded. I tried to take a picture but the lighting is hard to manage without there being a shadow. Are the scars slightly visible to you guys too? Or could it just be more an imagination thing; like since I know I’ve cut myself there it’ll always be in the back of my mind and that’s how ill always perceive my arm? I feel like it’s much easier to tell in person but I would not like to point it out to friends. The only reason why I think it could still be slightly visible is (ik 4 months isn’t a lot) but I’d only cut on my right arm, not my left. So when I put them together I notice it more. What do you guys think??

Comparison pics I took today vvv

**i tried editing it to try and show you where I find them visible but the lighting is tricky**

do you see them too? Or is it all in my head?