My friend sexually assaulted my other friend?


I am going to be completely open and vulnerable in this post. To begin, I am most definitely drunk right now. I think that’s why I am seeking out help. Just know that me being drunk does not invalidate the severity of the situation.

I really need advice. The reason I said I was under the influence is because I promised to be truthful. That goes to show how serious I am about the topic because I really need help. I knew I wouldn’t aim for it if I was sober. So maybe me being drunk is a good thing.

I need to give a little backstory I really wish you will read through it. It’s not super long I really need help though. 

I have two best friends.

My friend number one who I’ll call Vanessa is someone who I’ve been best friends with for a year. She’s helped me through so much and is the first genuine friend I’ve ever had. (She is a lesbian.)

Friend number two who I’ll be Dave is someone who I feel like I was destined to meet. He is one of the greatest friends I could ever ask for. (Dave is gay)

Everything was normal and great until two days ago.

I was at home it was a normal night I fell asleep and woke up to something that I didn’t realize would change everything.

Vanessa doesn’t have a car so I drove her to work that morning. She told me she had something really crazy to tell me. She told me that she gave Dave a blow job.

Our friendship is extremely open. We are super comfortable with each other so that’s just something to remember.

But of course hearing the news Vanessa gave me was extreme. 

She told me it happened because she was super high and so was Dave. The details were kept to a minimum when shaearing her side of the story.

Then later that night I talk to Dave and his story was different. He told me that when Vanessa started becoming touchy with him he became super uncomfortable. This was to be expected considering Dave is gay. Vanessa is super open about sexual activity so it wasn’t as weird for her even though she was a lesbian. She started touching him in his genital area. He told me he was paralyzed and couldn’t do anything. He didn’t know what to do.

Dave has been raped. He said that the first time being was raped felt similar to this time.

I’m going to spare the details because I think you know enough.

I am in such a hard situation because Dave despite everything says he’s willing to forgive Vanessa. Vanessa did a horrible thing that she is 100% ready to admit was wrong. Vanessa told me she knows what she did was horrible and wrong and is ready to give Dave all the time he needs to recover and move forward.

I just need outside advice at the end of the day. This is such a hard and weird and unique situation I have no idea what to do.

Please please please help. I’m so conflicted