I have dreamed since I was a child. I knew what I wanted. I watched how my parents were and vowed I’d never be like them. I made myself a promise that as I get older I’d do everything I could to make sure if I had a failed marriage like my parents that I’d never have to rely on the father. I make my own money and can care for my kids with or with out him. I was going to be successful. But the goal wasn’t to get divorced. The goal was to say married and have kids and have the family I always wanted. Little did I know than I was going to be diagnosed with pcos and have problems with my eggs maturing to drop. I didn’t know I wasn’t going to not have normal periods because they don’t teach that to you in school. They only teach you what’s normal. Also little did I know I was going to be so completely and utterly unloveable that standing at almost 29years old that I haven’t been in contact with anyone who’s fell in love with me in 10 years let alone commit to me. Looks like the only love I’m worth is from someone who’s abusive and controlling and manipulates. 🤷🏼‍♀️ idk anymore. I’m just a lonely CNA who doesn’t even make enough money to live on her own. Has struggled with college the last 10 years. Doesn’t have anyone to truly listen unless I’m paying them and can’t find anyone to see the good in her and wants to love the shit out of her.. and having kids is soon out the window. Life is shit. Life sucks and to me.. life can go to hell.