This is going to be a long one! Let’s jump right in with a little bit of background. My bd and I have been dealing with each other for about 12 years. During those 12 years we were together for a good 4 years. I found out that I was pregnant with my first child back in 2011 and I also found out he was cheating on me. We break up and go our separate ways until he comes back around claiming his love for me so I take him back and I end up pregnant with my second child in 2013 of course once a cheater always a cheater. He cheated again and got another chick pregnant. So me and her are pregnant at the same time. I’m done at this point I told him to go be with the other chick just leave me be, and he does for awhile. He continued to constantly come back in forth between us. At the time I did not care because I was young dumb and in love and I allowed him to do me dirty ( so stupid 🤦🏾‍♀️) I eventually get wise and cut the bullshit out and leave this man alone for a couple of years. So fast forward to 2018 we start dealing with each other again because he’s claiming to be single. I end up pregnant with my third child. The whole pregnancy he acted like I did not exist. He called me everything you can think of to try to get me to get an abortion. Fast forward to December 2019 I gave birth to my 3rd child somehow he finds out and shows up at the hospital. He tells me he’s getting married and that he wants me to be his mistress 🥴 I’m like if you want to be with me why get married?! That went over his head. I blocked him on all platforms and my phone. He gets married and on his wedding day he’s trying to get ahold of me. Why idk because I did not answer. So he got married in March of 2019 and in June of 2019 they separate because he claimed he chose the wrong woman. He says that he loves me and he made a mistake. So I take him back yet again. So fast forward to now, I went to a wedding back in June and he was keeping the kids while I went. The next day I go pick up the boys and there are eyelashes on his bed frame. He says he doesn’t know how they got there and I’m not stupid. No one female is taking off there lashes for nothing. Every since that I’ve been thinking I can’t be with him because he keeps doing the same shit. I know I sound stupid but damn I hoping to have a family with this man we have 3 kids but every time we try to make it work something happens. I know this is healthy for the kids. He’s mad because I told him I needed a break and saying that I don’t care about him or his feelings. We have only been on a break for like a week and a half and there was some chick texting my phone claiming to be his girlfriend like wtf. You can’t even chill for 2 weeks. On top of this he is paying my sister to run errands for him and clean his house. He has also paid her to take his other kids and her son to the water park. I’ve told them both that I don’t like her doing stuff for him. Neither one of them gave af about what I said. It’s clear that he doesn’t really care about me but why does he keep telling me he loves me and doing the opposite of love. I know I look stupid but I’m just looking for others opinions from the outside looking in. There’s more to this story but got dammit it would be a book.