Between having a mom that loves you, and a mom that loves you on social media.

Im autistic and I’m 29. My late husband passed away and I’ve been living with my mom. It wasn’t until recently I started getting income. I went to my mom for advice on me moving in with my boyfriend and how I’m not sure what to do because he’s moving over an hour away to where I’m at. Well, that’s a BIG move, I’m allergic to cats and he has 3. I didn’t realize until recently how much cat hair there was. And there’s cat hair all over his stuff and house (idk anything about how to clean cat hair off of furniture- I tried and it just kept sticking to the furniture.) lint rollers didn’t help at all and I kept waking up with a sore throat, and my skin is itchy because of sensory issues and the reaction I get... and all she could do is give me advice that would benefit her, not me.

And when I pointed it out, she got mad. I started crying and she said that’s the reason why she wants me to move out. Saying I can’t have everything I want. I know that. I don’t want him to get rid of the cats, not at all. But there has to be some way they won’t shed as much. I can’t live with cat hair constantly floating near my food. Or sit down on the couch and stand up and it looks like I’m wearing a fur coat. Or have my belongings destroyed. Is there a vitamin or something that can help? I’ve never known cats to shed THAT much. I just wanted advice on how to approach the situation without offending him or sounding like hey it’s me or the cats because there’s no way I would want him to do that. One of them was his late fathers. I just want to control the hair being everywhere issue.

I wish I could disappear. Not just because of this. A lot of stuff keeps building up and I’m just frankly tired.

My birthday was the other day, and all I asked for was a dollar protein bar. My stepdad got me two balloons. Like, I was hurt. She always told me that no matter how old I get, I’d always have a cake. She couldn’t even get me a protein bar. They went two days prior and bought about $60 worth of junk food for two of my stepdads grandkids who stayed one night. Idk, it just hurt me that I asked for something that was only $1 and I basically get screamed at. I went out and got it myself and got a candle. No one was around me when I blew it out. My dad didn’t even call. I don’t have any friends.

I never felt more alone in my life. I feel worthless.

My boyfriend, he just went to the fair with me since I was already going. He didn’t get any sleep due to work. I wanted to take my son to see my son smile at the monster trucks and win him something.

God I just can’t stop crying.

My late husband never would have let any of this happen. And it’s my fault because I fell asleep on him. It’s all my fault.

I want to get my own place, but my mom makes me feel so small because the only place I could be able to get is from a housing authority. Which there isn’t much freedom with. But if at least be able to move out and then she complains there is a waiting list.