Having a spouse is a lot like have a teenager
Them not being able to find anything:
Son: *Looking for phone that's right next to him on the table* MOMMMMM!!!
husband: *Looking for his knife that is right next to him on the table* BABBBEEEE
Getting them out of stupid sexual situations:
Me: I told you we should have started with something smaller if we were gonna try this on you
Husband: Just take it out!
Me : Okay. 123 *pull*
Husband: owe!
Son: Mom I was masturbating into a bottle and its stuck... Can you help me?
Me: Ughhh 123 *pull*
Son: owe!
These two motherfucker also seem to think food tastes better when it's MINE
Husband: *Eating my spaghetti I saved from Olive Garden*
Son: *Begging me for the millionth time if he can have my Cheetos until I cave and give them to him*
Then the simple fact that no matter how much they annoy or piss me off I love them❤
Edit: Don't worry. We have since had the what's appropriate to masturbate with talk.
Let's Glow!
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.