Please help… advice ?

Question

How can I build my confidence up , talk more( communicate) and not care what others think about anything . It’s tearing my family apart . I’ve never been a talker. I really need help being more social let alone just with him talking more , what could I do to talk to him about anything and everything lol. I don’t want to say or ask anything dumb, I’m trying to get a appointment with a therapist but everyone’s booked up right now so for the mean time what can I do to help me with talking communicating with him about just anything really. Social anxiety is bad ugh I need help getting out of it

Answer

If this is something you have been struggling with all of your life it will be hard at first, once you get the hang of it it becomes natural. I use to be very very shy, my mom spoiled me my whole life and talked to for me and fought my battles, doing that caused me to become an adult and have issues solving problems, speaking up for myself, and being heard. I always use to just stand in the back. I got tired of being pushed around, i really noticed it when I became a manager 2 years ago. And so I just started speaking my mind, being more head first more aggressive and most importantly saying exactly what I am thinking, no sugar coating. It’s been about 2 years and I am still the same way and it feels soooo much better to not be in the backlight all the time, life is just smoother in regards of relationships all around. I think it’s something you just gotta jump into, like learning how to swim or ride a bike. Just gotta do it and don’t stop or look back. and don’t remember Your main goal is always to BE HEARD.

Answer

After a lot of years working on it, I can socialize pretty normally at work, but I still struggle around my in-laws. At work, I have my work persona with pre-defined roles I need to fill, but in my personal life it's just the real, actual me, and that's a lot harder.
But one thing I will say is that the older I get, the more I come to appreciate some aspects of being an introvert and to resent some aspects of extrovert personalities. I so often see either articles about how to "speak up" or "be more extroverted", or see people asking for help like this, but I never see articles telling extroverts how to shut up and be self reflective and pay more attention to the feelings and subtle social cues if others. Studies show that introverts tend to be more tuned in to the feelings of others. If *you* feel like you need to speak to therapist about it, definitely do, but also... I really recommend trying to recognize the strengths you *already have* before reshaping yourself to be more suitable to the people around you.

Please help… advice ?

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