Thought husband was cheating ..

Ladies I need your advice.

To make it short. We have been married 8 years. We have 4 kids. The last two were back to back (unplanned) and I delivered 4 months ago. It took a toll on my body and my self esteem. I was really feeling down and moody. All these years my husband NEVER made me feel anything but good things with him and he’s generally a fun and sweet man. But as it is normal to drift apart because of work timings and friends and kids, it made me feel unwanted postpartum and instead of talking to him I let myself go and started thinking he was cheating and it lead to a spiral of endless arguments and fights (started by me). He was very considerate and tried to make things better, stayed with me for days just goes to work and comes back. He gave up so much during that time just so he can make me feel better. I even started to not take care of my kids and was so depressed. Anyways, I went to the gym and got back in shape and started to eat well and try to do new things. Our relationship is so much better now however, I get this phase of sadness for a few days and I feel angry at my husband for no reason as if he was the reason I felt unwanted and not good enough.

Deep down I know it’s just a projection of my insecurities on him. And I’m really giving him a hard time I’m always so tough on him and he keeps trying to cheer me up. Ladies.. do I need to see a therapist? Or can it be solved with some techniques and meditation? I feel like a have an unresolved anger towards him and a lot of things. I don’t want to lose him or ruin our connection. What an I do to feel better in general and have a better relationship with him and forget all the fights and things that were said during our arguments? Feels like a have a huge grudge.