My husband and I were about to start another go at <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> (we have had one successful <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> baby a beautiful girl after 5 long years she'll be 2 in October) hard part is again with coming up with the money I went today and had labs done and everything was green lighted to start! But I sat for hours looking over the money and Im starting to feel broken all over again on one hand I feel like I have NO RIGHT to be!!!!! Then on the other I........ I..... I'm so mad at myself others........God......(I'm not extremely religious not that it matters) I'm mad because it cost so much and I'm mad because it isn't as easy as stopping BC or baby dancing till the sun comes up I'm mad at my body..... Truth be told I hate it...... I don't want to look at it I don't want to baby dance I don't want to be touched I feel broken all over again but at the same time I want to be held so I can cry until I fall asleep but I won't because I just can't put my husband through that again when he already works 16-18 hour days to try and gift us the future we dream of! I just can't tonight for those who have read to the end

thank you;