Plans and Marriage

My fiancé and I got into a little heated discussion about getting married. As a planner and a overthinker, I like to have a plan for my marriage: finances, kids, sickness, etc. and while I know you can’t really prepare for everything, I’d at least like to discuss somethings so we’re on the same page about how he should handle things, together. I feel like everything is “up in the air” with our marriage and wedding because we don’t talk about it that often as I’d like. He wants to get married in 2023 but we haven’t talked about planing for the wedding or saving for it. Granted, he just proposed this year but it takes time and a LOT of money to plan a wedding and I want us to have enough time to do both. So I when I brought up an option to push it back just one year he accused me of not wanting to get married to him anymore. I’m like.. no? I just want us to have enough time to prepare.

His side is that he “can’t plan for hypotheticals,” saying that he’d rather focus on the now and getting money first rather than overthinking about the future. It just annoyed me because yeah, I get it. Like I said you can’t prepare for everything. But like it or not, these years are going fast and I don’t want to be confused or lost when we could have planned for our future. He said “literally all we can do is get money. That’s literally all that’s important to me right now. Let’s put a pin in talking about it for a year.” So I’m just like 🧍🏾‍♀️”okay.”

I’m grateful that he’s ambitious but I know I’m gonna be the one to make many of the decisions and it’s annoying.

Edit: I don’t think you ladies are understanding what I’m saying. I want to plan or discuss our future AFTER the wedding. Not just the wedding.