Hi all. I just joined this group.. feeling a little lost and need to get some feelings out. On Sept 28, I found out I was pregnant with our third child. It wasn’t planned and my initial reaction was panic.. thinking things like…how can we manage 3 kids? Life is getting easier with our kids’ ages, can we really handle the newborn phase again? Can we afford a new car to fit everyone? What about our Disney trip I was planning to book next summer? Things that seem ridiculous now. On Oct 10, I experienced my first miscarriage. I’ve read a lot of stories here and I realize this sounds ignorant but to be completely candid, this was literally the last worry on my mind. I was feeling great and always loved being pregnant before. When I spoke to the doctor she mentioned my age (37) and said eggs can be lower quality now, which could’ve been a contributing cause. I knew that before, but ouch…hurt to hear that. Aside from all this, I’m now feeling completely confused on what lies ahead. I feel guilty for not being excited right away when getting a positive test. Maybe things would be different if I had a better attitude (and yes, I realize that sounds silly). I had finally wrapped my head around us being a family of 5 and started getting excited. Do we now try again? Or should we take this as a sign to be thankful for the two kids that we already have and call it a day? People I’ve told say “you’ll know what to do when it’s right” but I honestly feel like I will never have a clear feeling on what is “right” for us. If you’re still reading my babbling at this point, thank you for taking the time and I appreciate you.