End Of A Friendship

My now ex-bestfriend and I have been best friends for over a decade. We became best friends in the 6th grade.

Fast forawrd to us in college and she moved to another state to live with her dad, and I stayed home. I busted my ass in college and she did part time. She would only ever call if she was in a "crisis." I know people get busy with their lives so I didn't mind being there for her. Well, I moved in with my husband, then fiance, and I was taking 16 classes, yes I mean classes not credit hours. I had lost our baby and she never contacted me. I was in mourning and I didn't pay much mind. I spiraled into depression and got behind on my classes. I was also planning a wedding.

Well, she called and told me she was coming down and she would spend time with me. She came down and spent the entire trip celebrating a nine month anniversary with her boyfriend. I had set aside two days for her like she asked, she ended up asking to move those days while she was here. I agreed. Well, when it came time for her to come over my husband was passing kidney stones. He was vomitting, bleeding, in a lot of pain. I needed to be there for him. I couldn't see her.

She ignored me for over half of a year. Never congradulated me on my marriage, no happy birthday, no happy thanksgiving, nothing. We're always super good about saying happy whatever. I called her many times over the months. There were times I also really needed her, my best friend, she didn't even know I was going through fertility treatments. I didn't have her support when I needed her even though I was always there for her.

She called one day out of the blue yelling at me. Telling me I was a horrible friend and just went on and on. Saying that I had control over my classes and my schedule and didn't make time for her. And how her boyfriend was right that I was a horrible friend and that he had no idea why she talked me up so much. She just yelled and yelled. When she was done she yelled at me to say something. I broke and I cried. I told her I was behind on my classes because I was depressed over my baby DYING. And that my husband had been in a lot of pain and I needed to care for him. I told her she knew what kind of person I was and that her boyfriend had no right to judge me or have my name in his mouth since he had only met me for an hour. I told her I was pregnant and that I had to go through fertility treatments, I told her how I almost lost my life, I told her how I needed her and she wasn't there. She never apologized. She was just quiet.

Well, here we are two years later. I had a life and death pregnancy that she didn't bother to check on me about, I bought a house, got pregnant again, I've been struggling to stay pregnant, and just graduated. Nothing. She only texts on holidays. Our birthdays came around, hers is the day before mine, and I didn't wish her a happy birthday. I was super busy and didn't even know what day it was. The next thing I know she's unfriended me, unfollowed me, removed all posts about me, taken me out of her bio, unfriended my mom, and my husband. She's had this horrible image in her head of me, that her boyfriend put there years ago, and it's not me. On one hand it hurts, but on the other I feel relieved? Like this toxic chapter of my life is finally over. I don't want to be petty, but I feel like I should unfollow her. Why keep following her if she cut me off for something so stupid?

I have a real best friend that I've had for almost 8 years and she's been nothing but positive. She's like a little ball of sunshine. We've never had any issues and being around her is just pure joy. Most people exhaust me and she gives me energy. I feel like I have this dark cloud that's finally gone. It hurts, but I feel like things are so much better.