Why are men so controlling …even exes?

Question

I went to pick up my kids from my ex’s mother. She lives in apartments that have a gate that you need a code to get into. When I got there, someone was going in so I just followed that car without calling.  She had told me to call her so she could let me in and would meet me at the front entrance. That irritates me because I have a right to know exactly where my kids are and I feel like my ex just doesn’t want me to know where his mother lives so I’m sure he told her to meet me at the front with the kids. He’s controlling like that. Anyway I drive around looking for her car so I’d have an idea which building she lived in and I could see her when she came out of her apartment. Anyway I guess one of the kids recognized my car so I didn’t get the chance to locate her apartment. I was still bothered so I asked her “Don’t you think I have a right to know where my kids are”?  She tells me that she “doesn’t want any drama around her house”. I guess you could say I went off on her. She NEVER tries to tell her son to do the right thing and I’m sick of it. Every time I turn around he just has to control everything. I seriously think he must still be in love with me since he tries to control my life so much and I told her so.  Being the bitch she is, she says you do know he’s married now right?  Of course I know!  But that doesn’t change anything. If he was so in love and married, why is he intent on controlling my life?
G.G…..We already have a court order and set days that we have the kids. I don’t get on with his wife so no I won’t be sitting down with her.

Answer

Idk where to start….
1.  So his Mom tells you she wanted to bring the kids to the front entrance because you cause drama and you go off on her?  Just proving her point. I wouldn’t want my neighbors to overhear you going off on your children’s grandma. 
2.  She was the one who asked you to meet her at the front but you blame him for being “controlling”.  That’s weird. 
3.  He’s married but you think he’s in love with you?  Girl! 🤦🏾‍♀️ Doubtful sis.
4.  The kids are with his mother but you snoop around to find where she lives. You’ve got a court order so you know you’re going to get your kids, why do you have to know what apartment they were in before you got them?  
I think you’re the controlling one and it sounds like you’ve shown your tail in the past with him and his mother if she doesn’t even want you near her apartment.

Answer

You need to take several steps back. Why is your EX controlling when it's his MOTHER that has requested for you to follow very reasonable conditions to entering her complex?
You tailgated someone into an apartment block that isn't yours, you're getting angry that you battled to find where she lived when, if you had just bothered to call like she requested, she probably would have told you where to find her unit or you could have asked.
When the kids are with him, you do NOT have the right to know exactly where they are. It's HIS time, not yours.
I stopped reading after you said you were trying to find her car and you have the right to know where your kids were. YOU are the one who is controlling here.

Answer

If you want to achieve something you need to react the right way. Going off on her just reinforced the way she sees you and now she is probably happy you don't know which apartment it is. I hardly doubt that your ex is still in love with you nothing of what you said points in that direction. The picture I get from what you said is that they think you are full of drama and they are trying to keep it away as good as they can. Maybe try to reflect on the way you react to them and make adjustments for the sake of your children, they don't deserve all of that.

Answer

This seems like a you problem. You get what you give, so if you’re giving disrespect, you will receive disrespect. Kids also learn from the adults in their lives, arguing with and disrespecting their grandmother while also slandering their father and step mother is not going to benefit them in any way. Is it really THAT hard to be cordial and coparent so your kids grow up seeing stable and cooperative relationships? Think of how your behavior is affecting your kids.

Answer

Because you allow it, because you tolerate it, because you don’t make any difference, sit down with him and his current wife, come up with new arrangements, or go to the Family Court and figure it out with them. Has nothing to do if he’s in love with you or not, it’s because you allow it, stop allowing and tolerating crap that you don’t find acceptable. If you can’t get through to him contact the family court.

Answer

In CA, both parents have the right to know the address of where the children will be unless their is a restraining order in place. Not sure what state you’re in but I’d request to know where my kids would be..

Answer

Why does it bother you so much that she requested you call and pull up to the front entrance of the building? It's really not safe to just follow someone through a gate. It's a security issue. She also has a right to request that you call first. My daughter and son-in-law always call ahead when they are coming to pick up their son. It's basic respect. 
I also don't understand why you think your ex is still in love with you. He's not controlling you, he's respecting his mother. None of this makes sense. I really don't understand why a simple phone call is so irritating to you.

Answer

Dont use  cups but i think i heard abt this one

Answer

I only use pads

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Why are men so controlling …even exes?

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