Last November I found out my boyfriend cheated on me through snapchat. It wasn’t physical but with the nature of the messages, it might as well had been. I decided to stay afterwards.

For the next year we went through a lot. I was diagnosed with PCOS. I started clomid and we had two miscarriages. He proposed to me in April. But through trying to put the pieces of our relationship back together I realized this man really does not know me.

Before him I was in a abusive marriage. So it was a breath of fresh air to find someone who protected me, spoiled me, etc and I fell in love off of that. I was so blinded by those things I longed for that I didn’t realize how much he didn’t know about me.

He always complains that I don’t cum fast enough when he gives me head but it’s honestly because he doesn’t know how I like it ate and it’s been 3 years, I knew how he liked his d*ck sucked after the 3rd time. He always talks shit about my family, especially my sisters. And I hate that. My oldest sister passed away in 2015 so my family is very important to me and he finds every reason why they shouldn’t be. My sister left behind 6 kids and when I buy them anything he says “those aren’t your kids.” And it pisses me off y’all like so much. One of the biggest pet peeves is he ALWAYS says the word f*ggot. I mean at least 20 times a day. He thinks is so funny and I’ve told him how much I hate that word. He says he grew up around his family who always said it so it’s ok.

Now we are engaged and have had foster kids for almost 2 years. Their mom doesn’t get out until 2023 and I refuse to send them somewhere else. I don’t want to take their only image of a positive relationship away but I’m so ready to leave. Advice would be nice but please don’t tell me I should’ve left when he cheated because if I had been viewing my relationship from where I’m viewing it now, I would’ve.