My brother and I have a decent age gap (9 years) because he was from my dads first marriage and my sister and I share both parents.

Anyways, growing up you are blind to a lot of adult problems. While I was still blind to them, I noticed my brother stopped coming home from college as much and after college rarely came home even for holidays. I never understood why. How could he not want to continue our family traditions.

But then I started growing up. The cousins we grew up with are high school drop outs or in and out of rehab. Teen pregnancy. Creepy older males. Drugs. Hi Parents letting their adult children live rent free with no jobs or ambitions in life.

Also important to note we grew up in a very conservative family. Like get in Facebook arguments supporting things kind of right wingers.

Once I went to college and experienced more of the world and could form my own opinions. I realized that I didn’t share the same beliefs as my family. But I thought, oh well, as long as we all get along!

Fast forward to COVID one year out of college, a lot of true colors started coming out from family. Me being called names and belittled for getting a Covid vaccine and not being a die hard Trump fan.

They think the pandemic is fake and a political stunt. They take no precautions and put so many at risk.

I have a masters in biomedical science and they didn’t even graduate high school. Which I never bring up or use to fight against them. It’s just ironic when they sit there and belittle me when I think I have the most educated opinion, but I don’t fight. I know I won’t change their mind. Not fighting back just makes them more mad.

Growing up I had multiple jobs, bought my own car, received scholarships to put myself through school for my countless community service projects. My brother was pretty good through school too.

Then comes my sister. Who barely passed high school. Got pregnant at 18. Never had a job or did any community service. Nothing. But my parents pay for everything for her. She pressured the guy who got her pregnant into proposing right after she gave birth when he clearly wasn’t ready. Now my parents are funding their wedding! WHAT?! I would have been kicked to the curb. Her rush to get married… she wants more kids and doesn’t want them more than 2 years apart. She has still… never had a job. But wants a wedding and sit at home to pop out more babies.

I am now seeing why my brother doesn’t come around much. My family lives in this little bubble. They are racist, homophobic, selfish assholes. It is so hard to watch. And even harder to want to be around.

I can respect differing opinions but not when you are disrespectful to others and not when others health is at risk.

So I decided to spend Thanksgiving alone this year. And it was the most peaceful and beautiful thing I’ve done for myself. My family was disappointed with my decision but I did it for me.