Being over emotional?

Casey

I’m currently 38w 3d with our double rainbow baby. I have been going through inconsistent contractions for 3 days. I cry constantly because I want to meet him so bad but I’m also going to be so sad to not feel his little kicks… I know he is safe where he’s at right now and when he’s here I can’t guarantee safety his whole life and it’s terrifying. Has anyone gone through this or is going through this?