You’ll never be my boyfriend, but I want to tell you this.

We’ve been seeing each other for almost a year now and we’re still not dating. It’s okay, I like being around you and commitment scares me a lot. You feel the same way. But sometimes, the things we do together make me realize how much I really really like you and I don’t want anyone else to have you. I don’t want anyone else to like you the way I do; I don’t want anyone else to make you laugh real hard like I do; and I don’t want anyone else to make you mad over some stupid shit like I do.

It’s funny how people usually wouldn’t want to be in relationships because of the drama and the commitment that it involves. But both of us don’t see anyone else and both of us deal with our dramas. For example, I got pissed over him not replying quickly when I asked him to come over and cuddle. So I (I admit I was petty) told him I’d go get it somewhere else. He got so upset and didn’t talk to me for a little while. If he didn’t feel anything for me, he wouldn’t act that way right?

But anyway. I am waiting for our one year mark so I can ask him again what he wants from me. I will simply tell him how I feel and what I want from him first then hear his side. If things don’t go the way I want them to, I’m going to lose a friend.. but it was fun.