We got 2 out of 3 of the boxes for the bunk beds

We took the mattress out of the middle room and put it in the living room

I bathed the kids and asked if they wanted to put the mattress in our oldest's room, and we could watch TV for a bit and sleep there

SO was asleep in our room

I didn't want to take the kids to our room and try to put them to sleep there and wake him up. I knew they would be really loud and try to fight bedtime.

I did ask him if he wanted to come lay down with us, but he said no.

It took about three attempts for the kids to fall asleep.

The dog pooped in the room, and then they wanted to play, and then they got hungry. Then we tried turning off the lights to sleep, and the baby had poop so I had to get up to change him.

Finally, we all fell asleep.

SO comes in super upset, saying sarcastically that he was sorry he fell asleep in the room

He leaves and starts making so much noise

I am terrified of him at this point.

He has punched holes in walls and threw furniture around in the past, so now I get scared when he's upset, and I hear loud noises coming from another room.

He comes in the room like three times, trying to talk shit and finally just asks me to please go lay down with him in the room

I go to lay down and go to sleep, and he keeps waking me up

He asked if I was still attracted to him.

I told him he was getting worse

I don't like him more than I did before.

I don't want to tell him I am not attracted to him. I want to be attracted to him. But, his actions make him so unattractive to me.

I'm pretty sure he wanted to have sex if he's asking about being attracted to him. He was just mad that I fell asleep with the kids instead of going lay down with him and having sex.

Idk what to do anymore.

He comes in the room and wakes me up to talk shit and I'm supposed to do what?

Am I wrong?

Should I be running to his arms after all that I have been through because of him?

It's 27 degrees outside, and he decided to leave

He says he needs love and someone to understand him

He knows that's asking too much from me because of the way he has treated me.

He says he feels uncomfortable in his own house and is giving me what I am asking for, which is space.

He doesn't want to go to the VA hospital because he knows what he needs, and they will just have him sit there and see him when they have time.

He said he would come back in a few days to shower.