Losing hope.

I'm staring at the test hoping desperately to see a line that just isn't there. Maybe if I wait another minute or so, it will appear. But of course, it doesn't. I lost a baby this past December to a miscairrage. It tore me apart but we decided anyway to start trying right away. I've never actively TTC so I'm new to all of this. My first was a whoopsie and this last one was a "if it happens, it happens" but that baby was so loved. I don't know how you women do it month after month. You are stronger than I am. I don't think I will track next month and I will try not to test as obsessively as I did this month. It is too stressful for this mama... good luck to all of you ladies. Sorry for this crappy post, I just needed somewhere to vent for a minute.