Let me start by saying this is my 2nd baby, third pregnancy. I had a early miscarriage in Oct and got pregnant in Nov.

Of course after finding out I’m pregnant with my rainbow baby I have a ton of anxiety. Fearing loss.

I started to spot a week after positive pregnancy test with my rainbow. Which caused a scare for me that I went in very early to see my nurse practitioner. She then told me that because I didn’t have my hcg drawn. That she didn’t even know if I was pregnant at all. & home tests mean nothing. Mind you I was planning on waiting till my 6th week to go get a hcg draw because watching those levels drop through the miscarriage hurt so much. I went in because of the spotting for 3 days and to get advice on knowing if I was going through another miscarriage or not. I asked her if there is anything I should be concerned about with the blood color and the spotting & if it’s normal to spot days after implantation. Her reply to me was “if there is a miscarriage happening, there’s nothing you can do about it”. Which is something I obviously already know right? Seeing that I couldn’t do anything about it in Oct. All I wanted was advice and to understand if it was normal or not. What kind of reply is that! Especially to someone that just had a loss.

Fast forward I seen her again at 6 weeks or so and she made me feel like something was wrong with the baby because she kept saying the baby is so TINY. & that she can’t get a very good measurement. The part that got me so annoyed with her was when she said “I think that’s your baby, I think that’s the baby’s heartbeat”. Also “this is why we don’t recommend woman get pregnant not month after miscarriage” Like wow thanks for the comfort lady.

I KNOW the baby is tiny at 6 weeks this is not my first rodeo. She did not have to state the obvious

Her saying “ I think that’s the baby’s heartbeat” made me feel uneasy. So again I asked her is there anything I should worried about and she says “if there is a miscarriage happening, there’s nothing you can do about it”. Right then and there I said “ I know there isn’t anything that I can do about it, I can’t lay in bed all day and can’t take a pill that will keep my baby with me. I have no control over this. I just wanted to know if I should prepare myself for a loss”. I was done with appointment. I went home crying for the 2nd time leaving her office.

I officially took her off my list this month. I will not be going back to her at all.

Went in to see another NP who was great on my 10th week

Currently I’m 13 weeks at the same new clinic but I was seen by someone else today because short staff and it spiraled back down.

I was seen for a total of 5 mins. She played the baby’s heartbeat for less the 8 seconds. I was so mad I didn’t even get to ask how many bpm. I really was in that room for a total of 7 mins then pushed out the door.

I don’t know if healthcare just sucks now due to Covid but I remember enjoying my 1st pregnancy way more. It’s like some of them are so heartless.It was not like this 5 years ago…

Sorry guys I just had to let it out because I’m so annoyed with the care I’ve been getting. This will most likely be my last pregnancy because my pregnancies are high risk. I just wanted to really soak it all in and this is the care I get😩