What would you do atp?

Question

Does anyone find themselves talking to their husband about finances and it being so uncomfortable? My husband doesn’t take the criticism well and I’m honestly always side eyeing his parents because of it. I don’t feel like I should have to teach him these things this was his parents job…just puts extra stress on it…I’ll ask him is he in a position to hear it and take it in he will say yes then the next day he is saying that “I did all that”…I’m not delivering this in a raised voice or anything that’s derogatory…and unfortunately we have to have these talks because we’re tied financially and now always will be…I want to avoid it and let him break his neck at times and let him figure it out himself…but it affects all 5 of us in so many ways…I’m also a stay at home mom and I baby sit 2 days out of the week which pays roughly 200 a week so like 800 extra income a month…I’m not materialistic or any of those things…but we make a good amount of money and it’s no way we should still have no money saved…

Answer

A lot of people aren’t taught money skill and it’s not because their parents didn’t do their job. It’s because those parents weren’t taught either. Take financial classes together. Learn together.

Answer

Yeah no. I grew up with my parents teaching me no skills that had to do with saving or spending. They never once mentioned credit or anything. I found out the hard way and no I’m paying for it, literally. I am a grown adult so I can do something to change it. I can break the pattern and learn. My husband has helped me tremendously and taught me a lot.

Answer

You can’t blame his parents for everything. He’s a grown man, if he doesn’t improve his situation, it’s on him.

Answer

I wouldn't side eye his parents. Sometimes parents teach things and their kids specifically choose not to apply it. Who cares how upset he gets. You're right and continue  to have these talk but I'd also add in that he needs to be able to take this information better to progress in life as a married couple. Explain to him how that you guys are a team no matter what each other brings to the table and you're meant to be there for whatever  the other person may lack in. That's marriage. 
Do you guys have one bank out? Maybe he needs A small account where 10 percent goes in and he can spend on miscellaneous

Answer

Sometimes its just LACK of knowledge. His parents probably didnt know and by the time they learned he was on his way out the house. Alot of us are like that. Me and my siblings had to learn from our peers, college, books and simply by being exposed to others with the knowledge.  You married him so im sure he must hve some good qualities. He working hard enough for u to be able to stay at home. I say just try to introduce him to new concepts in a none judgmental way. Look up videos on how to talk to a man as a prtner… not a prent. You will get further that way. Michelle marchant johnson and suzanne venker hve good info on how to communicate with men. 
    Also….. look unto Dave ramsey financial peace university and his debt snowball and everydollar. He has a youtube channel with tips for couples to set financial goals. This changed me and my dads life. My Dad as able to pay all his debt off and basically retire my mom after getting financially educated.  Me myself I now see finances much differently … avoid debt like the plague and am willing to go without to have better in the future. Please look him up i took the class. It even talks about how one partner may be a planner and budgeter and the other a “free spirit” and how to come together and not LORD over eachother but work together. 
       Your husband probably wants whats best but doesnt know whats best if that makes sense. Sometimes u dont know wht u dont know…. Until someone introduces it to you! Start by asking him to sit down with u and go over income and bills and come ip with a family budget! And see what can be saved every month. Thats a start! But do it respectfully! Talk to him like u would talk to your “boss” with a humble and educated and respectful demeanor!

Answer

My parents never explicitly taught me how to handle money and save. I'm just naturally a saver. I think of it like a personality trait. You'll need to take control of the family finances since it just isn't in his nature and he doesn't seem willing to make an effort.

What would you do atp?

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