relationship advice please!!

hi ladies. so im in an on and off relationship with the same guy for the past 3 years. he broke up with me a few weeks ago again but we are still seeing each other and doing everything the same as we were dating. when i bring up my feelings/ concerns with him it always ends up being turned around on me. i messaged him a bit earlier today and brought up something he did that made me feel upset, he then replied and said i do that too and started bringing up stuff i do instead even though the main topic of the conversation was what he did. i will admit i am not perfect and i do things too. i just replied with okay because i couldnt be bothered blowing it up into this massive thing and the conversation is over now.

my question is though am i getting manipulated? is this normal for it to be turned around and put back on me? does this happen to anyone else or does your man understand your feelings and not just get defensive? this is my first relationship and ive been in it for 3 years now so this is whats normal for me but im not sure