Im in the final count down of my 3rd pregnancy and I have, as you can imagine, life is already busy. I have a 13yr old son busy with highschool, an 8yr old son home-schooling because he has ADHD/autism, 2 pregnant dogs due the same time as me, and I manage everything needed for the running of my home and family while my husband works.

I love being pregnant and everything has been very smooth and calm. But my responsibilities and workload are so expansive that I have had little to no time to focus on me and being pregnant. I keep a weekly pregnancy journal so I can embrace my experience as much as I can but I worry that once the new baby arrives I will not have enough opportunity to bond with my baby as I should. 9 months in and I still feel disconnected to my pregnancy. I close my eyes and it feels like it's not me it's happening to. It could very easily be happening to a friend or sibling, because although I know there will be a new baby soon, the reality that it's happening to me doesn't feel real.

My father in law died suddenly just after we found out about our pregnancy so the world has felt off its axis this whole time, surreal almost. I'm sure this has impacted my ongoing emotions.

I am rational and stable enough to see what I feel is irrational. I know that I want to bond and take time to focus on my new baby, but I have so much going on already that it seems impossible.

My pregnancy hormones occasionally make me feel my emotions more strongly than usual, which I can handle, but it's a fine time between over worked and over whelmed.

I'm not looking for advice, but I need a place to vent.