I semi understand now

Growing up I used to see some of the guys my mom chose to date put their hands on her. Except 1, she was with him since I was 3, they split when I was 14. Til this day I wish she would’ve stayed with him because he genuinely loved me and her. My point in mentioning the guys that put their hands on me mother is because she’s in a relationship or engaged.. Idek at this point, to someone that not only put his hands on her, but put his hands on me too. Me and him got into physical fights multiple times. And I would always wonder why is my mom so stupid, why does she keep going back to him even after he abused her and me. She always went back. But I feel like now that I’m in a similar situation I can somehow understand. Now, what I mean by that is.. it’s a very tough situation to be in to be placed in between your partner you’re in love with & the children you love, carried and birth. And if problems happen between the two. I will always choose my children 1000000000% but man is it had to try to distance myself from the man I love. He did some foul sh*t the other day. I posted about it here and everyone told me to file a police report. I would never want my children to feel or think the way I did about my mom and why she never left him after disrespecting her and me and putting his hands on us on multiple occasions (my bd didn’t put his hands on my kids, he put his hands on me while our newborn was in my hands and he did it in front of my children). So although it’s hard for me to leave him alone I’m going to do it for my children. It’s going to be hard because me and him just had a baby together so I’m trying to figure out how this is going to work. My other two children dad isn’t involved so how would I go about letting my youngest see her father without bringing my children around him? I want my children to be comfortable. I honestly wonder if watching these men put their hands on my mom or just disrespect her, is playing a role in my relationships as a adult. I don’t know.