12am: baby wakes up for a bottle. Husband doesn’t hear her crying sane as every night for the last 8 months. She drinks a bottle and won’t go back to sleep unless she’s in bed with me.

215am: 3 year old runs into bedroom to pee and I take her downstairs to go. My husband has done this maybe twice in the past and it was because he was awake already starring at his phone.

Baby squirming all night keeping me awake. Husband sleeping like a baby.

6am: husbands alarm goes off. Wakes up everyone in bed except him. Me, 3 year old and 8 month old.

We start the day. Husband goes to work. Which also doesn’t happen every day as he doesn’t have a secure job. It’s been like this for years

645-5pm: I’m home alone with 3 kids. No car because husband takes it to work and also no money because I don’t have access to any of OUR money. Im trapped

430pm: husband calls that he’s on his way. He asks if I made dinner and says how he’s starving. We haven’t spoken all day. He doesn’t ask how I am or how the girls are.

5pm: husband comes home. Eats dinner while starring at his phone, ignoring me and the kids.

He gets changed for the gym. Makes a protein shake. While still ignoring me and the kids watching a show on his phone.

6pm: he goes to the gym.

7-730 pm: he Missed bath and bedtime with the kids like always.

830-9ish: I finish cleaning up and am exhausted and go to bed. Husband still at the gym

Repeat