Help!

So I really need some advice! I have been with this guy for 7 years! I cook and clean and raised his children! I never complain or ask for anything! I am the person that makes everyone happy first. The first two years were great! The last 5 are unbearable! I’ve had 2 heart attacks due to stress and I’m waiting on my disability and he pays for my health insurance in which I’m am so greatful! I also suffer from trama from my childhood and ptsd from my best friend shooting a abusive boyfriend who broke in while I was there and I’ve been seeing a therapist for that but can’t get better because I get pushed around, calling slut, bitch, whore, ignorant, loser and other names! I can’t voice a option or even talk because he tells me to shut up! Porn has to be on every time we have sex. I’m not allowed to go to family functions or visit my 71 year old mom. All I do is cry and sleep to avoid him getting mad! We only do the things he enjoys! He is my best friend or so was and I feel sorry for him because he don’t see he has a problem. Should I leave him??? I love him and I think he loves me but I would rather be dead than to live like this another day but he just won’t change. He blames everything on me. I’m 43 not getting any younger! What should I do?