Things seemed chaotic. My water broke and I thought for a solid day I had just peed myself, then the following day this horrible pain took over to the point I couldn’t talk or walk while it was happening it started around 3pm while I was at work, the 13 hours and 10 minutes before my daughter was actually born. It was like a bad cramp in my abdomen and lower back that almost felt like I needed to poop but wasn’t able to. After a few hours (4 to be exact)

, I finally decided to go to the hospital. I started out in the emergency room, but given I was 34 weeks pregnant, they transferred me to the maternity ward to be triaged and looked after. At first, it didn’t sound like I was in labor. I mean.. how could I be? But, after checking to see if my water had ruptured, and checking my cervix did it become apparent that I WAS in labor. As if the sudden dilation in my cervix wasn’t enough of an indication, the doctor performing the exam? COULD STRAIGHT UP SEE THE BABY’S HEAD.

After that, it was pretty much a blur but after a couple of hours I was admitted and transferred to the labor and delivery ward (it’s was now 12:30amish) because.. there was no stopping this baby. She was coming.

I made it to 5 or 6 centimeters dilated - COMPLETELY NATURAL aside from some mild pain medication for my head and vaginal area since it had been poked and prodded - before I couldn’t take it anymore and begged for an epidural just so I could sleep. Thank GOODNESS for that because on top of the pain, I could barely drink anything and keep it down, and I certainly wasn’t able to keep down ANY food whatsoever.

From there, things only moved faster. I probably only got 2-3 hours of sleep before the nurse came back in for a cervical check and revealed that I had jumped from 5 cm to 9cm and it was almost baby time. It was MAYBE only another hour or so before I finally reached 10 cm and it was go time. The nurse had to help me wake my fiancé who had been sleeping while I was sleeping, but he sat up quickly when he heard it was time to push. Pushing with only the nurse there took only a couple minutes before baby’s head was just partially chilling on the outside when I had to stop and wait for the doctor to come deliver her. That was the first hardest part. All this pressure in my downwards region and I had to pause with my daughter’s head partially sticking out. I had released a loud yell/scream and the nurse quickly told me to stop it because I was wasting energy and I needed every drop of energy I had to deliver her.

Fiancé actually had to be the one to help the nurse call the rest of the team in because no one was anticipating me to be ready to deliver her fully within MINUTES. Once the rest of the team arrived, the doctor slipped into her gown and pushing resumed. Only a solid 4-5 pushes is all it took at this point, And yes- I did actually poop but thank goodness no one said anything. I distinctly remember the feeling of her head just completely sliding out, like the worst part had all been done so when her body came sliding out I barely even felt it! All I really remember is this.. almost like a pop of a balloon that relieved all of that pressure. With excited nurses and a very excited yet shocked daddy, Willow River Murray was born at 4:10am on August 25th, 2022. 6 weeks earlier than her due date, and having been born at 34 weeks and a day exactly, she was laid on my stomach to rub and touch. Her sweet and soft little cries filled the air, her daddy cut her umbilical cord, and after a few moments my premie baby was quickly moved to the warmer and assessed, then once that was all set she was laid against my chest with a warmed blanket for skin-to-skin contact for 15 minutes. And I soaked up EVERY drop of those 15 minutes with the little thing that had just come out of me.

There’s a lot more to this that I’m still recovering from my mind as it was rather traumatic and I was robbed of an extremely happy, beautiful birth because my premie decided she didn’t want to stay in any longer. But that’s my birth story. 💖