This hurts a lot.

I’ve been through it 2 times already. This is my 3rd. And this was the worst.

Waking up to his texts. Sleeping to his texts. The day is so long when we don’t talk. Sharing songs, talking about life, talking about dreams and goals together. Flirting, a lot.

And then?

After 1.5 years of dating this guy and believing that he’s the one, you find out he talks to other girls the same way. A new girl every week, month? Who knows.

Well, I guess he knows how to play it well. He’s 10 years older, probably very experienced.

And now I’m here alone and hurt like never before. Because I genuinely fell in love this time, and it’s been half a year trying to forget about him, but he ends up coming back and selling more and more lies. And I am still buying them, I get happy again for like a week, and then he forgets about me again. And I get sad again.

I don’t know why I’m sharing this, I know I should forget about him, block him or whatever. I can’t. I know that I’m worth more than this. But I can’t. This time I just know that I won’t heal…

Ps. He called me once I pressed “post”. I don’t know If God is playing games with me or if devil does. It gave me power and I can sleep in peace tonight. But nonetheless, I know I should end this before it becomes a disaster…