I’m NOT looking for free therapy or anything like that. Just wanted to explain what’s going on and see if I should look into talking to someone or if this is normal for people dealing with loss of a baby. A little back story.

I have a wonderful 3 year old son. I was expecting my daughter at Christmas this year. I lost her at 17 weeks, delivered her, got to hold her and then she was taken away. The day my heart broke into a thousand pieces. I’ve dealt with death before, lost my dad at age 14 and my grandpa around 25. Death is hard and it can change people. My thing is ever since I lost my daughter I have these new “obsessions”. Now to some people you won’t think it’s an issue and maybe it’s not. It’s just things I’ve turned into HAVING to do daily, multiple times a day. They aren’t bad things thankfully. The first is I’ve become obsessed with vacuuming. I have one large area rug in my house and for the past month or so I vacuum it several times a day daily. I buy the glade vacuum powder and I CRAVE to see the vacuum lines. Like at work I keep thinking about getting home to vacuum that damn rug. After I go over it several times I have to smell it to make sure I can smell the vacuum powder still. The other new “obsession” is washing clothes. I recently started using the gain powder, softener and dryer sheets. I wash clothes nonstop from the moment we get home until bed. I wash things that aren’t even dirty. JUST so I can smell the gain. I got home yesterday and washed all my curtains, dish towels, couch pillows and all before starting on clothes because I HAD to have the gain smell in my house. I’m just wondering if this could be the start of something seeing as though it didn’t start until after my traumatic loss. Anyone with similar situations please feel free to share.