Tried for 4 years for my first baby.. it happened, I’m so grateful, he’s almost 4.

We’ve been “not not trying” for about a year, then started actively trying, for now about a year as well, for a second child. It’s not working. His tests came back fine, I’m getting another round of testing done, with no answers as to why this is so hard.

I feel like I’m running out of time. I wanted to have children closer together, obviously life has different plans. I don’t feel like we’re done, we both love kids and they’re our whole world, nieces & nephews included.

Everyone around me gets pregnant in a flash. I’m so happy for them and so sad for us. I hate that feeling of jealousy, when it should just be a happy time for everyone.

Every month that goes by with another negative test makes me more disheartened. I just want to see that positive, hear that heartbeat, prepare with my family and hold that baby in my arms.

Everything feels so hopeless right now and I guess this is just a vent.

I hope that anyone who may be feeling this way right now has good luck and receives this beautiful gift of life soon ❤️