Ive been living in America for 20 yrs. I moved here from Africa. I married my husband 8 yrs ago and we have been together 10 yrs . I realized now that my husband’s big attraction to me was him being able to help me navigate this country. I was young but not stupid, more so willing to receive the help. Now that i am older i feel my husband has resented me more and more to the fact that i am more independent. Maybe i didnt see it then but my husband talks to me like i just moved here a month ago. Its really driving me crazy. He really talks to me like i am clueless on many things, i can even say he talks down to me. I am 30’yrs old and i cant stand it anymore. He even tries to help me pick out funeral outfit for a family friend, he goes “i know you need help with many women things” .

It pissed me off like wtf are you talking about? He sometimes refer to how other women do this like this or women here do that etc, basically telling me how its done even with female stuff. I dont know how to make him understand that i dont need help on that way.

Another example: we stopped at Starbucks 2 days ago. My husband then takes a pen and paper and os writing something. He gives it to me to hand to the worker. Note has the name of the drink and is asking for extra caramel. I was so offended, i told him i can speak, and went in and got his drink.