Pregnant with baby #2. I have a 3 year old.

My first pregnancy truly traumatized me and I’ve never gotten over the whole experience. Hubby always wanted to expand our family but I was content with one because I feared the idea of going through the same thing I went through the first time. Well, now here I am and it feels like hell. Can’t eat or drink anything. Constantly nauseous/throwing up even water. Unbearable upper left back pain and cramps. Baby is perfectly fine thank God. But I’m having such a hard time. I’m so depressed. And In so much pain. Not sure how I’m going to survive this time around. I struggle with trying to keep up with my toddler while having to deal with these pregnancy symptoms. I just don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m being a neglectful mom and I don’t know how life is going to be with 2 kids. I just need some advice. Im struggling bad.