Intrusive thoughts and anxiety

I have 2 kids both back to back in the toddler stage and one has autism. I have no help,not the help I need anyway, like someone watching the kids while I work or picking then up from work for me.

I am always on running behind them I feel like a zombie,I can't sit down. I lost everything my job, car and the government daycare for my kids.

I'm rebuilding but I'm worried I'll lose everything again bc I can't plan for the unpredictability of single motherhood.

I also worry I can't protect my kids bc it's just me and my 2 kids are a handful. I'm worried I'll be overwhelmed when it's just me and my kids when I move. I always worry abt someone breaking in and what I'd do.

I also have su*c*dal ish/harm intrusive thoughts going through my head.

What meds stops these thoughts?

Even now I can't sleep

I feel like a schizophrenic with these intrusive thoughts 😔

@ Molly who do I talk to? A psych?