My boyfriend has been "friends" with this old co worker he has for quite some time. She makes me feel really uncomfortable and I don't like it. She gets kicked out by her parents who she lives with often and "has to sleep on the train tracks" so she asks to come here. I usually don't want her to and me and my boyfriend get in a huge fight and it results in her coming over. This time he slapped me in the face because I told him I didn't want to be cheated on. He told me you can't have a relationship without trust. He walked out of the apartment and told me his sister was coming to get him and we were breaking up but he actually walked to this girls house and got her. He told me to buy liquor so I did because I didn't want to fight anymore. Late that night about 6 am she has gotten sick and he puts her in our bed to sleep. He won't stop asking me for a threesome and this is something he has been going on about for 3-4 years and we've had very bad and physical fights about it. I remember I finally just broke and told him he could ask. I remember crying while talking to him and telling him I'm really scared. He kept talking to her about it and didn't really know how to initiate it. It made me really upset because one time he went in there to talk I went in the room and he was just laying in the bed with her. He wasn't touching her but he was laying beside her. He made me sleep in the bed with them and wouldn't stop pulling his dick out and trying to finger me. He made me have sex beside her. Later on when she woke up he asked again and I ended up eating her out while he fucked me from behind. He didn't do anything to her besides pull her boobs out and play with them. I feel so gross about it though. I keep thinking about how it felt to have her pussy juice in my mouth and her clit on my tongue and it makes me have to throw up. I haven't ate in two days and just keep throwing up. I don't know how to get past this. I would've never done this but he said he'd leave me if I didn't. I never wanted to have sex with anyone else and it has bothered me so so bad. I feel repulsed by my apartment, boyfriend, and especially my bed. I collect squishmallows and I am now considering selling them all as I can't take seeing them and they gross me out because she was laying on them. I feel like I don't even know who I am